I've mentioned before that I wish everyone stayed current on their blogs. So my apologies for being lax with mine. I got a second job. I didn't want to tell just in case it turned into something like my cake-decorating debacle. It too is only a few hours a week, - those are the best jobs as far as I'm concerned. But even working a meager 20 hours a week total, I'm left struggling to stay up-to-date with my blog. Hopefully that difficulty will subside as I get use to this new routine.
Now about my new job: I got a job at a quaint fabric store. It is close to my house and they let me choose my hours. It's much more "me" than my other job. My creative juices are always flowing and I love it. As far as fabric stores go, this is a large one and it's nearly void of all modern technology. (It reminds me of Rephans from my childhood.) As you may have guessed it's disorganized and inefficient and that makes me feel very valuable. I love going to work because I know when I leave, the store will be a bit more organized.
The best part of the job is my 40% discount and a $40 project allowance each month. To capitalize on that allowance, I have to display my project at the store for a month before I bring it home. But hey, I can do that.
Yesterday a lady came in and requested "boning." I'd never heard of boning so I asked what it was for and she replied with an edge, "to hold my tits up." At that point she had my undivided attention. If there was something in that store that would hold my "tits" up, (and that I'd get for 40% off) I wanted to know about it.
With the assistance of another worker, we were led to the boning. I was sorely disappointed to find it was basically the idea of an underwire bra.
I don't "do" underwire bras and here's why:
It was years ago. I was wearing an underwire bra that lifted and separated quite beautifully. I admit, I looked great. :-)
A man came into my office to do some work on the building and as we discussed what he would be doing, we realized I needed to get something from another building on the property. I ran both ways.
When I returned, his and my relationship had changed. He stared awkwardly at my chest and I grew really uncomfortable. I tried to be poised and graceful, but not without emotional duress.
He needed a check so I went to my desk. As I bent over to get the checkbook out of a drawer, my chin rubbed against something. I looked down at my chest and to my horror saw one of the underwires protruding about 5 inches from my red sweater.
What would you have done? What would Ms Vanderbilt, etiquette guru, have done? I wish I knew. I however pulled the wire the rest of the way out and dropped it in the trash can as if it was a piece of lint.
When I handed him the check our eyes met again. He was trying to conceal the fact that he was about to die laughing. I was trying to keep my hot cheeks from bursting into flames right then and there.
That, my friends, is why I don't do underwire bras.
Labels: arkansas, funnies, work