Angels

I just took down the Christmas tree. But before I did, I sat and looked at it to see if I could conjure up a poem. This is a personal tradition I started last year; I poem that is Christmas tree related. My Christmas tree is a very personal thing, so I wanted to capture some of the memories. Again, I'll say what I say every time I write a poem: I am not a poet. A couple of "real poets" read my blog, so I want to add the disclaimer, lest someone thinks I think I am a poet. However, I do find the exercise and discipline of trying to write a poem good for me.

Angels

White paper angel
crowning my tree
Hailing love and good tidings
from friends near the sea.

A heavenly being of
gold sequins and thread
Bittersweet reminders
of memories dread.

A blond angel in a red dress
and a brunette in blue
Bearing pictures of daughters
aged one and two.

White feathered angel
that shines a blue light
Bidding me love from
my darling tonight.

Angels of beeswax
and alabaster too
Crystal and gold from
friends old and new.

My angels bear greetings,
love and goodwill
Bringing annual joy to
my heart with appeal.

Boxing Day

Today is Boxing Day. Every country settled by the English, except the US, celebrates Boxing Day. I had never heard of Boxing Day till I met Gordon. But now I recognize it nearly with as much celebratory gusto as Christmas Eve and Christmas Day.

Boxing Day originated in England and some say it was the day that servants were given off. They worked Christmas Day, but were given a boxed gift from their employers on the day after Christmas. Hence the name, Boxing Day.

Another theory is that it's the day that people gave boxed gifts to those who had served them throughout the year; postal workers, milk men, porters, etc.

The tried and true facts, I really don't know. But Boxing Day, December 26, is a holiday up here.

Today we had our big Christmas meal. Gordon's mother joined us. It's been a really good day. We think we are onto a Christmas rhythm that we want to remember for the future. It's been one of the most relaxing, deeply fulfilling Christmases I can remember. Blissfully low key, yet totally satisfying.

I did a serious no-no though. Unknowingly, I dealt my family grief. Here's how. I have never ever bought Stove Top Stuffing. But I've been served Stove Top quite a few times and have grown accustomed to it and even kind of like it. I always make cornbread dressing, all from scratch. I didn't realize till today that my family is committed to the Southern style of dressing.

The trouble started when the kids came from the pantry wanting to know why we had Stove Top boxes. I told them they were on sale 50% off and I thought, Heck, why not. No one will care and it will make my day lots easier. The groaned like I told them we drinking strychnine for cocktails.

Later Gordon was on the phone to our friends in Calgary who are coming to Edmonton tomorrow. Gordon was telling them we would eat leftovers tomorrow. "Valerie makes this cornbread dressing like you wouldn't believe..."

At this point, much too late to start the cornbread dressing, I realized, Oh shoot, it really does matter to my family. So with shame, I served my Stove Top Stuffing. I really felt like a cheater. The time and effort saved were not worth it.

As we hashed all this over at the table, I remembered a conversation I had with my family when I was in Arkansas recently. We were discussing dressing and how it comes in two versions: Yankee and Southern. We discussed our tastes, all of us, being from the South, agreed that Southern dressing is the only way to go. I however told them I had had some good Yankee (Northern) dressing.

My brother mockingly rebuked me for my lack of loyalty. He sighed and said, "Valerie, there was a war fought for this cause."

(Just in case you don't get it, he was joking that the Civil War was about Northern versus Southern Dressing.)

Cold and Christmasy

Merry Christmas! We have had a wonderful wonderful day. It's been fun and relaxing. I hope your's has been as well.

Gordon and I have commented several times today about our girls being great gift givers. They obviously studied their subjects before buying gifts and gave every one gifts they will enjoy. This is saying a lot in this household. When Rachael, Hannah, and Deborah were much younger, they were selfish Christmas shoppers. Their unspoken motto was, "It's all about me." For example, once Deborah got Gordon pink lip gloss, Hannah got him red nail polish, and Rachael got him a pink tape dispenser. They were clearly hoping he would pass his treasures on to them. No longer! We've come a long way baby. It's been a fun, yet relaxing day.

To Remember

Let us remember that the Christmas heart is a giving heart, a wide open heart that thinks of others first. The birth of the baby Jesus stands as the most significant event in all history, because it has meant the pouring into a sick world of the healing medicine of love which has transformed all manner of hearts for almost two thousand years... Underneath all the bulging bundles is this beating Christmas heart. -- George Matthew Adams

Merry Christmas Loved Ones!!

Let the Festivities Begin

I have to admit, I've been kind of blue this wonderful season. I usually get into the festivities; decorating, baking, guests, blah, blah, blah. But this year has been kind of bah hum bug. I kept trying to get excited, but I never quite accomplished it.

Tonight at the Christmas Eve Candlelight Service, the Christmas spirit awakened in my soul. I don't know why it waited so long, but I could hardly wait to share the joy with my family.

After the service we came home and did "the stocking thing" that we do every year on Christmas Eve. It was so fun, as usual, seeing the joy on every one's face as they opened their stockings. I loved it.

I am the family stocking stuffer; I presume most moms are. It's the one time of year I absolutely love being the martyr. I feel so good when everyone realizes I didn't get anything in my stocking. It's such a special time. "Aaawwhh, poor Mom. I'm so sorry," the kids lament.

Gordon does his annual speech: "Honey I am so sorry. I didn't grow up with stockings, so I didn't remember to put stuff in yours. It just didn't cross my mind."

I reply as usual: "Really, don't worry about it. It's that sick martyrdom thing. I love it that you all feel sorry about forgetting me. It's worth far more than gifts in my stocking."

I know this means I'm one sick puppy, but I really love my empty stocking. For a few brief moments out of the year, I have them all eating out of my hands. It's such a powerful feeling.

Well everyone is gathering downstairs to eat junk food and watch the Grinch. I must get down there.

Merry Christmas Everyone.

A Christmas Story, by Hannah

To perceive Christmas through its wrapping becomes more difficult every year. -- E. B. White

Is it everywhere or just the pagan city I live in? Christmas is soooo not a religious thing anymore. I have seen no front yard nativity scenes anywhere. None. Zero. Zilch. It was this way last year too and I told Gordon I wanted to have one made for our yard, but I never did. I wish I had carried through with that. Perhaps that should become one of my New Year's Resolutions. Yes, I think I'll include that. Surely I can pull that off if I try hard enough.

Last night I found a report that Hannah had to write for school about a true Christmas story at her house. It amused me. I didn't know this story had happened. It sounds just like my girls, but it surprised me still. I will write it out just like it reads in her story.

"I was 5 years old and it was 3:00 am Christmas morning and I was awake. I was very exited about Christmas and was eager to open preasents. I had been awake since 2:00 am. The rest of the family was in bed. I snuck out of bed and went to wake up Rachael. When I got to her room, she was already awake. "Rachael", I wispered so nobody would hear. Rachael answered, "Yes." "Are you exited about the preasence" I asked. "Yes" she said "lets go see." "ok" I said. We tiptoed to the living room and looked under the tree. There were so many presents. I took one of the presents under the tree that had my name on it and said, "I am going to open it if you won't tell. I won't tell if you open one of yours!" Ok I won't tell" she answered "and I'll take one too." She grabbed a present for herself and tor the rapping off, so did I. I had a book called The haunch Back of Notor Dam. "Cool" i said. Rachael had a pair of socks. They were green with red dots on them, "there so cute" rachael squeeled. The sock were cute. "Lets hid our things under the sofa so mom and dad won't see them" I said. "OK" Rachael said. "I wonder when everybody is going to wake up," Rachael asked. "I do not know" I replied. We went to look at the clock. It was 3:30. "They're not goin to be awake for a long time" Rachael said grimely. She looked at me and said, "Well see you later, I'm going to bed. are you?" "Yup, good night." Rachael went to her bed and I went to mine. I got all snuggled and warmed up and had a good night's sleep."

Did you smile when you read that? I did.

Christmas. A time for love, goodwill, peace on earth, lies, deception, and various mendacities.

Christmas

Christmas is not a time nor a season, but a state of mind. To cherish peace and goodwill, to be plenteous in mercy, is to have the real spirit of Christmas. -- Calvin Coolidge

Bah Hum Bug

I'm feeling blue. Lethargic, unmotivated, yuk, plain blue. I put up the Christmas tree early in the week and I've been melancholy since. It's my first year without Stephanie's ornaments on my tree. It's part of a tradition I started when she was a baby. Furthermore, it's a very very dumb tradition, at least that is how I'm feeling right now.

Every year each child gets a new "special ornament." Then one day in the very distant future, when said child has his or her own home and own Christmas tree, their special ornaments and the ones they've made over the years go to their home to their tree. For 21 years that has seemed so noble. Now it's a pile of pooh.

Last year I cherished Stephanie's ornaments all season, knowing full well it was my last year to have them. I boxed them with love and care when I took last year's tree down. I never mailed them. I kept them on my sewing table, neatly boxed up all year long. When I went to Arkansas last month, I hand delivered them.

I honestly didn't expect to have gross sadness over the whole ordeal. Shucks, I've had 21 years to get used to the idea. I think the problem is giving her the ornaments she made me. I look at my tree and what I see are the ornaments that aren't there. I don't really miss the store bought ornaments, but the hand made ones are the ones that are dealing me some misery. The baby Jesus wrapped in swaddling clothes that she made at Little Lamb; the bear from kindergarten; the hand painted wreath with her picture in it. Gosh, it makes me want to cry just typing it.

What a stupid mistake. Now I realize the one's made for me should have stayed with me. The ones I bought for her should have been the ones to go to her.

As I told my sister all this, she consoled me by saying, "I could have told you that was stupid." And sure enough, that was stupid.

Bursting Light

For a year I've been reading the Bible in the New Living Translation and enjoying it. Yesterday I read Psalm 112. Verse 4 reads, "When darkness overtakes the godly, light will come bursting in."

That's a beautiful word picture, don't you think.

Christmas Is A Comin'

Isn't my sister Stacie's living room lovely? I love it. I also love the color of the walls. I wanted something like it, but Gordon vetoed.

Gordon Sings Joyfully

Today was the first Sunday of Advent and the first Sunday to sing Christmas carols. Gordon loves Christmas carols and always belts them out louder and more fervently than every one else.
Our opening hymn was Joy to the World -- a personal favorite of Gordon's. As usual, his powerful baritone voice rose above all the others.

Between verses one and two, the musicians played an instrumental interlude. Gordon of course was caught up in singing his heart out. The whole church waited for the usual direction as to when to begin singing. Everyone but Gordon. As the interlude began and all voices hushed, Gordon belted out, "Joy to," before realizing it was an instrumental moment. Chuckles abounded around us, the girls and me chuckling the most. Not easily embarrassed, Gordon smiled and shrugged his shoulders.

By this time, the interlude was finished, -- or so Gordon thought. Once again when it sounded as though the new stanza was beginning, Gordon rose to the occasion of leading out. Clearly, with much worshipful gusto his voice rang out, "Joy to," before he realized again that this too was part of the interlude.

This time the girls and I moved beyond chuckles to all out laughing. Gordon is the only person I know who could do this without being humiliated. But again he smiled and shrugged his shoulders. After that he waited for others to start singing before he opened his mouth.

I, for one, was thankful.

New Pets

Deborah got a hamster for Christmas. She named him Harry. When Gordon took the girls to the pet store to pick up supplies for Harry, they came home with a surprise for me; 2 new mice. I was less than enthusiastic. I love animals, but mice? The girls begged and pleaded and I reluctantly agreed to the new house mates. Two hours after they arrived, the house stank. I went to Hannah's room and the stench about knocked me over. "This is not a good sign," I said. Hannah sheepishly agreed.

By evening time I could smell them in my bedroom. I shouted, "I can smell those rats from here and they've gotta go." No one argued. The smell was pretty convincing.

The next morning Gordon took the girls and their mice back to Petsmart. He told the clerks that the mice stank and they matter of factly said, "Oh yeah, mice stink, especially males." (Ours of course were males). Did you know mice stink?

An hour later my family arrived home with 2 new hamsters. Dusty and Smudge bring our rodent population up to a bustling 3. I'm fine with hamsters, I even like them. We've had several and they've all been loved.

World, meet Dusty, Harry, and Smudge.

Christmas Morning and Smore Time

Merry Christmas

We are on chocolate overload. At this point (I know this emotion is fleeting) I never want to see another chocolate. I have a reputation for loving chocolate and I've definitely had my share over the past couple days.

We were awakened by the girls around 5 this morning. I was pretty grumpy and told everyone to go back to bed. At 7 we got up and found them all sitting on the sofas waiting for us. Holy cow, how do they go on so little sleep?

After reading the Christmas story from the Bible and praying, we began opening presents. As usual it was a long drawn out affair with lots of excitement. I am pleased with how the kids show kindness and gratitude.

A subtle shift has taken place in the gift giving. Rachael and Hannah are getting fewer toys and more young girl type gifts. Rachael got her first loop earrings and they both got body spray, a watch, and incense for their rooms. Oh my. What happened to the doll and lego days? Deborah still loves toys; Polly Pockets, Barbies, My Little Pony.... She also got a hamster cage and tomorrow will be going to the pet store to pick out her little rodent.

After gift giving we went to church. None of us really wanted to, but it seemed like the right thing to do. We got dressed in a hurry and away we went, looking like we just rolled out of bed. We were so glad we went because it was such a warm, intimate service. We thoroughly enjoyed it. The girls were called up to light the advent candles. I had totally forgotten that I had agreed to that. Thank God Rachael dressed appropriately. She looked like a perfect lady. Hannah looked like a farmer in her overalls and Deborah had on the same dress she's had on for 2 1/2 days. Yep, we sure made an impression, I feel sure. I had on my favorite sweat suit. Anyway, it's not about how we looked, is it? It really was a good service. I was thankful we went.

Gordon had to go to work this afternoon. We found out on Friday that he got a promotion. I'm proud of him. He has a "good name." He's a hard working man of integrity. I'm thankful for him.

Later on, the girls and I will watch It's a Wonderful Life and make smores as we do. Several years ago, Stephanie got us this nifty smore maker and boy do we make memories with it.

Merry Christmas Everyone.

No Presents Under the Tree - Yet

People often ask why we don't have presents under the tree. Well it so happens that I have a very good reason. For one, where would Frodo sleep if there were presents under the tree. He has claimed this spot as his own. Doesn't he look cute?

But the real reason I don't put the presents out is because I am trying to teach the children that presents aren't what Christmas is about. Since we've done it this way all their lives, they don't think it's strange.

There is great excitement in the house on Christmas Eve and their expressions are priceless when they walk into the living room on Christmas morning and see a huge stash of presents. It's a fine tradition. I'm glad we have it and I'm glad my kids are starting to "own" our traditions.

This year, because of Frodo, we don't have ornaments on the bottom of the tree. He found everyone of them that were within reach the first day. I promptly moved them out of his little snout's reach.

It's the most wonderful time of the year.

Merry Christmas Everyone, especially you Mama. All the pictures are for you. :-)

Christmas Eve at the Dykstra Home

It's been another delightful day. We had our big Christmas meal today. After plenty of time allowing it to digest, Gordon took Rachael and Hannah to see Narnia. Deborah and I stayed behind for some quality time together. I wanted to see Narnia too, but Deborah didn't. We've heard from several people that Deborah looks like Lucy on Narnia. Since Deborah doesn't like the way Lucy sounds like she looks in the book, she isn't fond of the idea of looking like Lucy. She has a tiny bee in her bonnet regarding looking like Lucy. Having a dog named Lucy doesn't help.

The highlight of the day was opening our stockings -- our Christmas Eve tradition. Everyone was excited and slightly goofy through the whole thing. My girls are so sweet. After pulling out each item, they would hug the giver and say thank you.

Our Christmas crackers had these silly crowns in them which is why Gordon and I have on paper crowns. His highness insisted that I put my picture on the blog if I was going to put his on. Everything in good clean fun, of course.

It's been a great day.

Merry Christmas Everyone.

Rachael Christine
December 23, 2005

We started our Christmas festivities tonight. First we had a "finger food" dinner with wine (non alcoholic, of course :-)) then we watched Ernest Saves Christmas. When that was over we took hot chocolate and went to view Christmas lights.

It's been a fun filled family evening.

This is Hannah and Deborah.

The Light

I sit in silence
The ticking of the clock is the only distraction
The fir tree in the corner lights the darkness with delicate intrusion

"He is your light," they say
"He lights the way"
"His light drives the darkness away."

His light is His gift to me.
My gift to Him? Receive His light.
Let Him light my dark path.

He is in my darkness.
Only in darkness can I experience
the the dawning of a new day.

Only by dying can I be resurrected.